How Can Ex-Spouses Successfully Co-Parent?

We know co-parenting with your ex is probably one of the toughest challenges you will face going forward. When it comes to raising children with an ex, there are no co-parenting rules. There are only strategies and some work better than others. Our Chicago family law attorney can advise you on how to approach family law matters.

Here are several strategies that have worked for other parents facing this same difficult problem.


  1. Do strive for consistency. Having consistent drop off and pick up times and locations for visitation time for your ex will make transitions easier on your child.
  2. Do create routines. This can be as simple as every Saturday grabbing a bagel with your child. This can be a fun and consistent thing you can introduce into the lives of kids going through divorce.
  3. Do make transitions as easy as possible. Your child will likely be moving back and forth between two households. How would you like to be living out of a suitcase and switching home base multiple times a week? This is even harder on children than it is on adults. Whatever you can do to make this easier on your kids will help them through this frequent shuffling back and forth in their lives.


  1. Don't speak ill of your ex. This bad-mouthing behavior will backfire. You will also put your child in a position of having to choose sides. This adds more stress and conflict to your child's life.
  2. Don't argue with your ex in front of the kids. If you have gone through a bitter divorce, resentments are probably still brewing. But arguing in front of the kids just emphasizes that you no longer have a united front. Keeping disagreements behind closed doors will go a long way to better ongoing co-parenting for your kids.
  3. Don't be so hard on yourself. Co-parenting after divorce is tough, but with practice and some strategies in place, you and your child will adjust better to this new reality.

Make Your Consultation Appointment

At Downs Law Offices in Illinois, we keep you focused on what's important: your children and your family life after divorce. Cook County lawyer Robert K. Downs assists clients with custody agreements, modifications and other divorce issues. Let our experience benefit you in your journey of co-parenting after divorce. Call us for a case consultation at 312-781-1963. We work with clients throughout the greater Chicago area.